Move On

I haven't blogged since August. And it is now mid-October. How do I express in words what is going on in my life right now? A photograph of a very twisty roller-coaster would be a good image to sum everything up. Let's see. Quick summary... Since the time I last wrote about what was happening to my marriage and our family, things have have not improved toward reparation. Spencer has filed for divorce and has no interest in resuming the life he had with me. It's a matter of a few months before we will legally be, simply, parents of the same children. How sad is that? I feel great sorrow each time I hear about his life away from us because each time it reminds me that he is completely done with the love he had for me... he has given it to someone else now. It also makes me sad that he has made choices that will ultimately end in sadness for him. I am still having trouble wrapping my head around the fact that he has decided that a new relationship is better than what we had (which I thought was a wonderful work-in-progress). I guess the hardest part is that I had invested my heart for a love that would be eternal... never to end. So, even though it's been over 3 months since he's been gone from our home, I still feel that commitment, that loss. I will be true to that commitment until the divorce is final and I am ready to move on.